I saw this on *MutantPiratePrincess (https://www.deviantart.com/mutantpirateprincess) s journal and just had to do it
Dear John,
I don't know how to say this, but I hate you.
I think I realised it when I was taking a walk in London, and I saw you ignoring my best friend.
I'm sure you're ashamed enough to understand that the garbage-man turns me on.
I'm sending back your artificial teeth, but I'll keep your suicide-note as a memory.
You should know that I have never laughed in public about hating Shrek.
With pain,
Sunari
Dear- your partners name- (if you're single, write John)
I don't know how to say this, but __1__.
I think I realised it __2__ __3__, and I saw you __4__ __5__.
I'm sure